Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Life is full of contradictions. You believe that you have a way of thinking but you behave differently. Yes, my life and probably yours too - is really weird.. Sometimes, a lot of things dont seem to make sense.
Allow me to cite some examples.. for one, I hate smokers! I can't conceive why people would smoke to harm their health just to look cool. So what if you say it soothes your nerves, some even say it helps them to run faster (Zz I pwn them anyway..) I say it freezes your system functions and you’re a nuisance with your second hand smoke.
But then again, as much as some of us might complain about these annoying smokers, the contradiction lies in the fact that we practically get ourselves exposed to loads of fumes from public transport every single day.
I eat alot and don't get fat. My definition of a lot is 2-3 meals per sitting and a total of about 9 meals a day, not including snacks. Weirdly, when I consume lesser food, I get even fatter. Hence, I have resorted to eating more to slim down.
I love to be kept busy, having things in my hand just calms my soul. I believe that by being busy, I have purpose in life. However, every time I get bogged down with work, I'll then take on an extremely stoned state and just grudgingly complete whatever shit that is thrown at me..
For most part of the time, I’d just become a mindless soul bent on completing my task. And during moments when I don't have any work to do.. I’ll complain that my tutors dont assign enough work..!
Still, i'm without a doubt.. the ultimate king of procrastination.
I'm a geek in the sense that I keep myself updated with the IT world but yet I don't go about seeking gadgets to amuse myself, just the occasional necessary musings to fiddle about with.
I seek to have a personality of my own by having my own style but can't seem to find a formula. I don’t know who or what is the real me sometimes.. Maybe I emulate too much of what i see..
I tend to talk a lot in front of strangers, just to make them comfortable.. but when I'm in a crowd and just a lone figure, I will dilute to the background. I’ll be the most anti-social guy ever, simply refusing to participate in any social activity..
I talk about being flexible and spontaneous with my thinking but I have this weird obsession of planning and having a "what to do next list" in my mental conscience. Its like, my impromptu-ness is actually an action that was already running through my head..
I reckon i'm just a walking contradiction who confuses even myself! It seems that my subconscious mind is lost in transition from adolescence to maturity, or insanity..Labels: Random Ruminations
12:36:00 PM
