back then.

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

I am certainly not cut out to be a pirate.. Of the 7 seas.

One time, I received a parrot as a gift.. this particular gift was no ordinary parrot though.. that damn bird had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary.

Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity..
So then I tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing jazzy classical music and everything else I could think of to "clean up" the bird's brain.. to no avail.

That was when i got so fed up, I yelled at my parrot..That bloody bird had the nerve to yell back!

I took the parrot into my murderous hands and shook it hard!
But it only led to the sickening bird getting angrier and even ruder.

In desperation, I grabbed the bird and threw it in the freezer.
For the next few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed!
Then suddenly there was total silence.. Not a sound was heard for over a minute.

Fearing that I'd just committed animal murder and risked facing the wrath of the animal society, i opened the door of the freezer.

The stupid parrot calmly stepped out and said.."I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I'm sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior.."

Boy was i stunned at the change in the bird brain's attitude..

I was about to ask the parrot what prompted such a dramatic change in his behavior, when it continued..

"May I ask what the chicken did?"

Thank you NTUC for safe-to-eat frozen chickens!

10:45:00 PM